Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Earnest Pleading

December 2013
Celebrating 32 years
Please don’t die please stay nearby
Ideas circling mind my mind
Words looping creating manifesting
Chemical reactions affecting
Heart rate, sweat perspiring rivulets
Along responsive, susceptible skin nerves
Ending in tickling, tingling agony
Words looping into images striving
Competing for cognitive attention
For action, for plans, for plans which fail
Because people leave, interfere, push, shove
Because people leave, snort, hide, run


Because people are people plans fail and then
And then
And then
Please don’t die please stay nearby
Thoughts eddy triggering emotions
Confusion destroys plans directs options
Ally needed, hearing needed, seeing needed
You are needed
Not easy to admit not easy to understand
Not easy
It is not easy
But you are love
And so
And so
Being abandoned no longer matters or frightens
Except for one thing one future getting old so
Please don’t die
Please
Please stay nearby

Saturday, August 16, 2014

Spontaneous Planning (October 30 2010)

Birthing children
Creating Family
Destroys spontaneity
Which ironically
Is
Required
When one has children
Planning chaos
Chaotic planning
Spontaneous grocery shopping
Meals needing planning
What is next, next, next
Spontaneous napping
During
Planned television show
Planned basketball challenge
Evolving spontaneous
Snowball fights
Ah, yes!


Friday, August 15, 2014

Findings (11 5 2010)

Venice Canal

I had a dream. It was stolen, painted in a time warp by Titian, lost by the Medici’s, hung in The Hague, pilfered by Hitler, then rescued by my guardian angel and discovered in an attic in Harlem. The eager youthful artist captured a series of digital prints and posted them on YouTube, and I found my dream again. 

But I dreamt it in color, and now it was in gray tones.

Venice Canal

Friendships Are Born of Light (February 18, 2011)

1954
Once upon a time, there was a little girl whose hair had a little curl, and whose feet loved a little twirl. Spinning joyfully in sun sparkle splendor she brought into her heart and mind the fluttery whiteness of cloud and the whispery wonder of breeze. Sprawling on the grass she felt the earth spinning too, and it was good and right, to spin together with the ground and the sky.

Always seeking lightness and brightness to match the star shine in her imagination, she gazed through gauze window curtains, peeked through fire reflective maple leaves, and played piano music on the pond water which made ripples of delight for hours.

She had no idea that others did not synchronize their movement with the spinning planet around her. She did not realize that others did not dance with the breeze playing music with the oak leaves. She thought everyone knew about this type of love.

She was wrong.

After five decades mourning her loss of dance and her touching the moon beams, she keens a song of loss, howling quietly at the full moon. Then one day, her child joins her and they howl together, louder, at peace with expressing their heartache without words. Later day, a friend joins her and howls at the full moon, the white brightness casting artful shadows on her friend’s face, making new patterns of lace and loveliness there.

It was a miracle, a re-birth.

How many rainbow souls howl alone at the moon? Can we connect by riding the teasing happy wind? Can we grasp sunbeams breaking through cloud fluff and like a helium balloon lost from the grip of a child at a parade find one another in sparkies?

I am joyful, body singing lightness breath and companionship. The light shining through tree leaves is the same as the light shining through hearts, radiating from eyes, leaping galaxies from stars.

I have friends. This I know. This I trust.

Wiggle. Spin. Flap. Leap. Sing. Breathe in, out, close eyes and see the light is inside me.

It’s been there all along.

Practical Toxic Brain

 
Neurons Firing


Thinking of being a Living Organ Donor
Donating my brain
While it is still a bit useful

Nah

When it's taken out of the 
        skull casing
It will likely go PPPHHTTTTT and 
               scoot all over
The operating room like a popped balloon

Yup.







April 29, 2014

Photosynthesis: Tree stars





Trees breathing. Breathing trees, radiating life, welcoming. Step slowly, rolling from heel to toe, silent levitations as I approach best friends. Breathing slows to match the pulse of tree radiance; casual lifting arms so fingertips can caress bark, stretch out to the smooth bark on one side, and extend to stroke the rough and crackled bark on the other side.

Cool air whispers on skin and evening dew drops leap off the wild grasses to runnel long pant legs. My soul heart sends out sapphire sparkles, matching my trees, crafting layers of symphonic light. Shimmers indigo weave a comforting shroud hiding me in friendly shadows. Closing eyes, finger tips scarcely grazing gnarly bark, depth and breath entangle between trees and soul.

Infinity pace, infinity slow, toes begin a slow rise, they point, and the knee bends. Arms elevate through crisp oak scent air. Finger tips embark on a journey into cobalt air, sparkies releasing, golden human soul sparkies waltzing with silvery azure tree glow. Bending forward, inhaling deep quietude, the first toe restores its step, allowing my other foot a dancing opportunity, torso arcing, head dipping in oblation, in sacred response to life. Meeting directly overhead, arms and finger tips fashion a heart. Eyes opening, eyes wondering, the trees reflect with their limbs and branches, myriad hearts, and I see.

I see. Tree lights spinning, yielding to gentle breezes, then pausing. The gems of light are familiar. They resonate with memory. Eyes closing. Head tilting back. Eyes opening, glimpsing night sky. There. And there! Pegasus, glistening overhead—and also among the tall trees. The Seven Sisters, the Pleiades, source of summer shooting stars, twinkling, almost winking at Earth, above me, and near me between the dark trunks. Just above the horizon, barely evident, Orion, the triplet of sparkles calling me home. As I gently pivot on my back heel, there, hiding at the edge of a thicket, the tree stars mirror Orion!

Entering the center of the glade, subtle music performs a nimble melody, teasing my skin, my ears. Standing tranquil, silent runnings, the soles of my feet intermingle with dirt. Outstretched arms tickle leaves tenderly landing along my shoulders, my face.

The tree stars close about me. I hear their question. I exult in the question. I discover my answer.

“Birch.”

And the tree stars answer.